Sunday, August 5, 2012

Answer: Something I Never Thought I Would Do


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Question: What are "Belly Shots?," Alex.

When I was pregnant with my first & second, and I say this without a hint of hyperbole, I never felt sexier or more beautiful in my life.  As an obese woman, I think I relished in the time that I was supposed to be round & curvy & I felt great.  My belly was supposed to eclipse the plane of my boobs & be round & full.  It was awesome.  It didn't hurt that I felt physically fantastic as well. 

Even with all of that good feeling, there was something that wouldn't let me take pictures that really documented or celebrated the "bump."  There are precious few pictures of me pregnant with my son & only a sparse handful with my daughter. 

When I looked forward to my "healthy" pregnancy (a moniker which I have since decided is a big fat joke--more on that later) I vowed that I would take the pictures.  I would chronicle the growth.  I would love each stage & celebrate this, my last time creating life.  It never once occurred to me that I wouldn't feel every bit as lovely & round & wonderful when I started out with a leaner, stronger body.

What a shock it has been as I have cried about my weight gain & the changes in my shape.  I don't feel sexy or beautiful.  I feel frumpy & slow.  I feel awkward & lethargic.  And I feel shallow & conceited.  I hid in the house until I made "the announcement" because I was sure that everyone was whispering, "that's the girl that lost the weight...see...it doesn't last." 

Now that I'm "out" I feel a little bit better.  My body is also cooperating & I look more pregnant & less chunky than I did even a couple of weeks ago.  I guess that's part of the third baby: my body isn't willing to fight the good fight when it comes to showing--it's just all hanging out there. 

So, without further ado, here is the first of many (I hope) belly shots of our Three-quel (because every good nerd loves a trilogy):
14 Weeks

3 comments:

  1. this is one of my favorite "fridge shots" :) soo happy for you Sara!

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  2. I hope you and baby are doing well. I miss reading your blog! You have been so inspiring to me! I've lost about 20 pounds...but have a LONG way to go yet!

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