Wednesday, December 15, 2010
I've never been a big crier. Probably because I look AWFUL doing it. Even as a child, my eyes would become immediately bloodshot & my nose would insta-drip down my face & I'd develop a weird saliva issue. Pretty. I think somewhere along the line I decided it wasn't worth the the ravages to my beauty to bother crying too much.
This morning, the enormity of my past year hit me like a ton of bricks & I couldn't stop the show. It took quite the mix of odd circumstances, but when they all came together it was like Niagara Falls up in here. It went as follows:
1. Yesterday Lincoln asked, "May I pretty please have strawberries for breakfast." I don't know for sure, but I'm guessing my three-year-old self's heart's desire of breakfast food had something to do with the golden arches & a lot of syrup. My kid craved berries...real ones, not the "crunch" variety.
2. Last night I watched the "Biggest Loser Finale." I have nothing but love for BL & I would count myself among the people that they refer to incessantly on finale night: "the millions of people at home that the Biggest Loser has helped." However, there was something different for me about this finale (the third I have watched). I didn't see the contestants as Herculean anomalies, I viewed them as peers...& quite frankly, some of them dropped the ball & squandered a fabulous opportunity. To date, I have a higher percentage of weight loss than 9 of the 21 people featured, & almost identical to another 2. That's not to say that I think that there was anyone who hasn't done great things in their life, & I don't want to minimize anyone, but it really put things into a brand new perspective for me to have these people seem extra-ordinary rather than extraordinary.
3. This morning I got into the car at 5:45 to go to work out. This is not out of the ordinary at all for New Sara, but quite unfathomable for Old Sara & given my already reflective mood something struck just right as...
4. "Dynamite" came on the radio. I rarely listen to current pop music, but I was driving Dave's car (yes, Dave's) & he had the radio set to our local KISS station of teeny-bopper drivel. "Dynamite" is frothy, it's celebratory & it was just the kind of party anthem that I needed to set the happy waterworks on full force.
Even now thinking about it, & listening to Taio for the 50th time this morning, I'm choking up & feeling incredibly proud of myself & thankful for the journey & just plain happy about how I have used the time given to me in 2010.
However, back in the car on the way to work out this morning, I was snapped out of my reverie & back to dry land by the end of the song, at which point Elvis Duran comes on to segue into a pleasant little game called "Stan on the Crapper" (couldn't have made that up if I tried). *sigh* Back to the real world.