A Plate Full of Progress

Like many husbands/boyfriends/partners before him, Dave  claims finishing rights to my plate when we go out to eat.  On my ornery days this prompts me to order things laden with tomatoes, mushrooms & seafood in an effort to protect my lunch leftovers.

Through most of our relationship I would insist that if Dave was going to finish my food he HAD to take the plate & set it in front of him, as a signal to the server that I hadn't eaten all of the food...because the judgement of a server that I would likely never see again was too much for this obese girl to bear.

This evening, while Dave was scavenging off of the plate while it was still in front of me, I realized that sometime in the not to distant past I've grown beyond that.  It's not a big deal, but it's a deal & I'll take it--evidence of mental progress.  I won't say that the server isn't judging me (I was a server for FAR to long to delude myself of that), but I will say that I don't give a flying fig.  Proof that my head has in fact changed though my tush is back to a size that I find regrettable.  Or maybe it's proof that I'm a mom of three littles & I don't have the energy to waste on judgmental strangers.  Either way, I'm not stressing about the unimportant opinions that others hold of me.  So I've got that goin' for me--which is nice.

Back in the Saddle

Yesterday at 6:35 AM I woke up with a start & the horrible memory of canceling my 5:15 AM alarm rather than snoozing it...so that it wouldn't wake Dave up.  While that seems nicey-nice, I promptly fell back asleep (a usually useful skill in the era of middle of the night feedings) & missed my first weigh in.

Here's where I'm super glad I picked a winner, not a wiener.  Though it meant that he would have to get three kids ready for our morning plans without me, though it meant he had to get up earlier than planned, though he was sleep deprived, Dave kicked me out the door to go weigh in.  

It's so easy as a woman/wife/mom/human to put yourself on the back burner.  I goofed & I didn't want my family to pay the price.  Dave reminded me that when it comes to getting healthy, the sacrifices that we make as a family in the short term are insignificant compared to the suffering it could save us in the long run.  So he got three kids up & started pancakes & bounced a screaming baby because there was no bottle in the freezer & everyone lived to tell the tale.  And though I missed my meeting, I weighed in & started my new streak of accountability--something that was invaluable the first time around.  I have to prioritize myself & the things that I need to succeed--& listen to Dave when I fail to prioritize because he's a clever fellow.

See how clever we are...

We were rewarded with a 2.2 lb loss.  Would have been more if I had gotten up in time to feed the baby beforehand.  That's what I get for being lazy.

"Before" Jeans

So much of my prior process was marked by my jeans (see here, here , here or here).

Fresh start appears to be no different.  Yesterday I decided to rifle through my closet & come up with some non-maternity jeans--not because I have a problem with wearing "maternity jeans," but because I have a problem with WEARING maternity jeans.  They fall off.  And then I'm in a situation where I'm actually displaying my previously confessed, utterly disgusting maternity undies.  Since that's not a show for the young or feint of heart I decided to see what I could find that would actually stay hitched up for my trip to pick up my son at school.

Good news: I found ONE pair of jeans that fit.
Bad news: They're my "Before" pants.  You know, the ones that I wanted to hold up in front of me & drop them away a la Tommy Lasorda's mid-80's Slim Fast commercials.  I didn't get to my goal weight prior to getting pregnant, so I never made the video, but I tucked those jeans in the back of my closet knowing that I'd get there.  Little did I know I'd get to wear them again in a less comical, more practical manner.

One of the last times I wore the "Before" jeans (April 2010)...I was excited
to be back into them from maternity jeans last time...this time notsomuch.

It's a little discouraging that I'm 40 lbs lighter than the last time these pants fit & here I am wearing them again.  It's not even the size of the pants that bothers me, it's just the fact that they are THE "Before" pants (the fact that they are hugely flared & completely out of style doesn't help my ego any either).  I know that having a baby four weeks ago means that my body is a different shape & a lot will change with a little time...I just hope that time is as little as possible.

In the mean time, I might just take a couple of Target coupons I found & get a couple pairs of "Until Then" jeans.  Why-oh-why did I have to be so thorough with my Goodwill runs the last go-around?