Sunday, April 17, 2011
I live in a hilly (Iowa hilly, not real hilly) neighborhood, but somehow I managed to line all of my running segments up with downhill stretches...all except the last 30 seconds of my last run. Up until that point, I was feeling pretty confident, pretty powerful, pretty awesome. When those last 30 seconds hit, I thought I might die...in fact, Bon Jovi was telling me quite emphatically that "I ain't (cringe) gonna live forever."
As I was running uphill, with my cemetery "dead" in front of me, I realized that that exact moment was an image of where I'm at right now in my bigger journey. My rate of loss has REALLY slowed down. There are all sorts of factors contributing to that, not the least of which is that it just naturally becomes harder the less you have to lose. Stupid science. As I'm hitting the tail end of losing I have to work so much harder for each ounce & it's getting frustrating. I soared through the lion's share of my pounds feeling confident & strong & that confidence is waining a little. These last "30 seconds" are my Everest.
As a way to push me through, I spent last night making an ugly & uninspiring page of my progress. I am committing to update it with new weights weekly & new measurements monthly. After all of the compliments & kind words from friends, family, & loving strangers, it's time to kick up some scrutiny to bust through my budding complacency.
I'm also ready to do it...I'm ready to set a final goal weight. I am going to weigh 134 lbs. My hope is that I'm close enough (28.2 lbs) that it will be motivational, rather than insurmountable. I'm not setting a time limit, I'm just setting a finish line. It may take me another year to finish these last 30 seconds, but I'm going to do it--just like I did it this morning. And then, like this morning, I'm probably going to cry.