Monday, October 24, 2011

Lil Manilow Power


Yesterday I put on my ruby slippers fuzzy boots & said with fervor, "There's no place like home, there's no place like home."  Our week-long trek across the Midwest came to a close & as I dragged my weary body out of our jam packed van & into our house I was hit with a wave of appreciation.  Of course there was the usual post-trip euphoria over the prospects of sleeping in my own bed, having access to my whole closet (such that it is), & peeing in my own toilet (yup...fills me with joy).  But new to this trip, in fact new to my whole life, I didn't feel like I was coming out of a food free-for-all from which I would need to spend the next couple of weeks recovering.  Talk about a reminder of the changes in my life. 

Previously I've used trips as an excuse to get buck wild & dreaded the return to reality for both the gut check of consequences & "giving up" vacation freedoms.  Parts of me that were less tuned in to the joys of sleeping in my own bed were always fearful of facing the music at the end of a trip.

But this time there just wasn't any music.  Something funny happened last week.  I ate a LOT of my grandma's lemon bars (ok, that's not funny), but I made adjustments in what I was eating the rest of the time to help compensate--subconsciously.  I wasn't really thinking too much about it, just listening to my body.  Eventually my body told me that if I ate any more lemon bars I was in danger of turning into a Lemonhead.  And then I stopped.

I think this week MAY have been a taste of life after goal.  I've been terrified that I won't be able to make a graceful transition into maintenance.  This season of life has been a very selfish & self-centered one in which a large percentage of my brain power & emotional resources are funneled straight into me.  My family bends to me (what does Sara want to eat, when does Sara need to workout, where does Sara want to go out) with the idea that this is a temporary situation to achieve a long term goal that is in the best interest of all of us.  Sometimes I worry that I will never be able to relax the hyper-focus.  This week proved otherwise, & while I did gain, it was a reasonable gain of 1.8 lbs...not an Old Sara 10 lb Vacation.  I felt in control.  I made choices as opposed to giving into impulses.  And 1.8 lbs?  I can swing that between breakfast & bedtime.  No sweat.

To capitalize on feeling in control of the moment, I FINALLY took the plunge into Bridge to 10K that I've been promising myself/putting off.  Turns out, it was awesome & I rocked out 4.07 miles with nary a hitch.  A new playlist on a new iPod (thank you, Sam!) had me flying.  And I know you're wondering, so I'll let you in on the secret: yes, I have Lil Wayne & Barry Manilow on the same playlist & yes, I think that is appropriate.  Bring it, Living History Farms...I've got Lil Manilow Power.

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